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Late Night Is Still Reeling Over the Government’s ‘War by Emoji’

by TSB Report
March 26, 2025
in Trending
Reading Time: 1 min read
Late Night Is Still Reeling Over the Government’s ‘War by Emoji’
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“And by the way, it wasn’t even Pete Hegseth who added him, it was some other incompetent guy at the highest levels of government, OK? Like, what, you think Hegseth has the editor of The Atlantic magazine saved in his phone? No way, all right? If Hegseth auto-filled a contact into a group chat, it would be like, ‘Tampa Bay Blonde With Bugs Bunny Tattoo.’” — RONNY CHIENG

“Apparently, the reporter was mistakenly added to the group chat by Trump’s national security adviser. This adviser can’t catch a break. Today, he sat down and butt-dialed the nuclear codes to North Korea.” — JIMMY FALLON

“And even if they didn’t accidentally add a journalist into this group chat, they weren’t supposed to be talking about this stuff on Signal in the first place, OK? Signal might be a good app for you and me and our local drug dealer, but it’s not for the Pentagon to plan wars on.” — RONNY CHIENG

“Today Trump said it’ll never happen again, and from now on they’ll only talk about war plans over Snapchat.” — JIMMY FALLON

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